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Yeast Infections   
04:34pm 16/03/2005
  The moral of the story: you can always go front to back, but never EVER venture back to the front again.  
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You get a fat ass and fall off the face of the earth   
11:26pm 29/12/2004
 
mood: satisfied
My friend and I have always had this running joke that anyone who messed with us ended up with a fat ass and fell off the face of the earth. This theory of ours proved to be true when when I ran into an old friend the other night. I was at Walmart picking up a few basic supplies when I ran into this guy I hadn't seen in about three years. We have a long history together, and I thought he was the love of my life when I was in high school (This was of course before I realized I was gay). He was the only person to ever really break my heart. It was awkward to see him with his girlfriend, but to my utter delight, he was fat (as was his girlfriend). I am really not quite sure why it is so wonderful to see someone you hate end up fat, but it is. I have actually lost quite a bit of weight since I last saw him, and he commented on it. Ha! I win and he loses.		  
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Christmas Rocks   
04:49pm 26/12/2004
 
mood: chipper
This year was a good Christmas. I say that mostly because my parents got me a laptop. It is absolutely fabulous! I am sitting on my bed and browsing through live journal. It is definitely the best present ever.		  
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A day in the life of Joe Republican   
02:02am 18/11/2004
 
mood: amused
*I am not sure who wrote this, but it really cracks me up.

A Day in the Life of Joe Republican (anonymous as of now)

Joe gets up at 6am and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.

With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to ensure their safety and they work as advertised. All but $10 of his medications is paid by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too.

He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and how much it contained.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for the laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks on the government-provided sidewalk to subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Joe begins his workday. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal union member fought and died for these working standards. Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union.

If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get workers compensation check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of a temporary misfortune.

It is noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FDIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression.

Joe has to pay Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the country would be better off if he was educated and earned more
money over his lifetime. Joe forgets that in addition to his federally subsidized student loan, he attended a state funded university.

Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards to go along with the taxpayer funded roads.

He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans.

He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking cheese eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe
wouldn't have to.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that the liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe
enjoys throughout his day and takes for granted today.

Joe agrees: We don't need those big government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I have.		  
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Merry Christmas   
03:24am 07/11/2004
 
mood: exhausted
So, today hasn't exactly been the best day ever. I was already slightly irritated at a couple of my friends because they can be real jackasses, but that is not as annoying as what happened to me tonight. I went over to my friend's apartment to celebrate her birthday. I had just gotten off work, and I was not in the best mood. After hanging out for a bit, I was beginning to relax and have a good time. My phone suddenly rings, and it turns out to be a friend who had just left the party. She preceded to tell me that the police were outside taking pictures of my dad's car. I had borrowed my dad's car because mine broke down earlier this afternoon. I go outside to investigate, and sure enough, the police are standing there next to my dad's car with a couple of rednecks. As I walk over, the police office asks if this is my car, and after I reply that is, this girl actually says, "Merry Christmas, somebody hit your fucking car." Some how it just hit as an inappropriate way to break the news to somebody. Maybe it is just me.		  
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03:39pm 05/11/2004
 
mood: bouncy
Why is it that spanish pop just gets you all pumped up? All I have to do is throw in a little David Bisbal or Sonia y Selena, and I am ready to take on the world.		  
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I fucking hate America   
01:15am 04/11/2004
 
mood: angry
I woke up today and realized that this country is completely shit. First of all, Amendment 1 was passed here in Georgia. Amendment 1 basically bans gay marriage or civil unions in the oh so progressive state of Georgia. I am not shocked that the rednecks that live here would vote this way on a gay issue, but I am very upset that our state legislature put it on the ballot. Hasn't the government traditionally protected the rights of minorities? Why would they ever put the rights of minorities into the hands of the majority? It blows my mind. Why are people so threatened by the idea of a gay couple? There is so much hate and violence that goes on in the world, so why would anyone have a problem with the idea of two people finding love even if those two people happen to be of the same sex. Secondly, I have to live through another four years of that jackass in office. I wonder, how many people will he kill this term? Do another 20,000 people have to die in Iraq because the American people are idiots? How many more children will lose their lives, limbs, or parents in Dubya's campaign on the war against terror. I wonder what a child in Iraq, who has lost a leg because a bomb went off in his neighborhood, would say about the war on terrorism. Yep, this country is definitely complete shit. Maybe it is time to move to Canada.		  
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  estrojennn
 
 

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